Opposites attract...but can it last?

Huckleberry wants to contribute his thoughts on opposites. In his opinion the whole idea that opposites attract does not produce a sustainable relationship. Sure it may be the reason you are attracted initially but how do you keep a relationship alive when you have nothing in common? Opposites are less about attitudes and personality and social standing and  more about works of fiction...a prince and a chamber maid, a millionaire and a hooker, a biker and an heiress. The list can go on! A relationship of opposites is hard, hard work. You have to work double time to find common interests or you would never have anything to grow and cultivate together in the future. I know this first hand. 

Conversation with Huck today got my wheels turning and spurred my research. Research is what I like to do and revel in it. Opposites do not attract according to many different studies of couples. Men and women wish to find someone that share common interests with common and attitudes. The researchers say that opposite pairings rarely develop into long lasting meaningful relationships and typically end prematurely. The studies show we want someone that has similar ideas. Someone with a similar back ground and upbringing. Similar ideals. More is written about couples that have similar personality traits. Extroverts tend to blend very well. Neurotics do too - though scary. Even couples that share conscientiousness or anxiety are normally happier and more satisfied in "coupledom." 

One study conducted talked about the only time a woman seeks her opposite has to do with her sniffer. I have a very good sniffer. I can detect subtle smells and changes in smells that many cannot. Sometimes I think I'm losing it because I smell something no one else does...like it's a phantom smell.  Quite honestly I think it's the consolation prize to being hard of hearing. Ok, so this opposite thing regarding smells....women are attracted to men that smell different from their own gene pool. We are attracted to a man that have "major histocompatibility complex" genes. These genes affect our immune system and women that find a man with a gene smell opposite theirs mean the pairing will result in a happier marriage, strong sexual attraction, and healthier children. Oh dear, God! The babies again. Huck, I swear you spiked my coffee with something! I do have to admit though, I love how my handsome man smells. It's not just his cologne, it's him. I feel comfort, attraction, need, desire, and love each time we embrace and I draw in his smell. 

The studies also say we want to pair up with someone that holds the same views we do. For example it means a great deal to me that Huck is close to his family. It would be disappointing if he weren't. Oh and he loves kids. His voice changes and his eyes twinkle...it's a very sweet transformation. These moments I see his weakness. Then in the blink of an eye he goes back to being my bad ass mofo beau hunk that I love just as much. 

It's a good thing to have some differences, too. We can't like all the same things or even dislike all the same things. But having similar interests, attitudes, and personalities do not make a boring relationship contrary to the 'opposites' camp. There will always be a story to tell and new knowledge to share. No time to be boring. We have interests outside of our relationship of course. I like artsy stuff and Star Trek. He likes to golf and watch sports. We both love reading. The point is there are so few opposites about Huck and I that what's next looks fantastic! And easy!

As always,

M